Today was a very full day for me, I needed to do things all over town. It all started very early in the morning taking the A train from Brooklyn to downtown Manhattan. After putting up with some kafka-esque bureocracy at the bank, I boarded the R train to Midtown, then the S shuttle train from Times Square to Grand Central, where we got delayed for 10 minutes.  After a long, unsuccessful meeting, I walked up to the E train to get back into Brooklyn.   It had been one of the worst days in recent weeks,  and then it hit me:  I had done the A-R-S-E route.  No wonder I had encountered so many assholes that day!

This made me think: Could I really influence the outcome of my day depending on which trains I took? I decided to conduct an experiment and pretty soon I had solid scientific evidence that my theory was founded. For example, I found out that you can really ran into the least attractive people in the whole subway system by riding the A line then the R and finally the F. Or the A-R-F route.  Don’t even think of adding the B line to this group, especially on a late Friday or Saturday night.  You will create the B-A-R-F. I met a really drunk chick throwing up there.

The possibilities are endless. Try riding the B line uptown, transfer to the A and then go to Brooklyn and back to Manhattan on the L line. You’d do the B-A-L-L route. Do in on a hot summer afternoon, wearing shorts and no underwear.  Or test your luck by taking the F and trasfering in Brooklyn to the E,  switching to the A, then going all the way to Queens on the R.  Do it very late at night… You’ll know the meaning of FEAR.

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